.
What?God is my dearest friend, greatest fan, constant supporter, creator of all my most intimidating “if you steal my stuff I will hunt you down and harm you” threats, and occasional partner in acts of social protest *cough* crimes and misdemeanors *cough*.
She’s also way smarter than me, and a lot funnier, and so I will randomly post random things here that no one else will make any sense of, randomly, because I can. :]
Aaaand THIS exists because – yeah. the J/Z part is at the end. This is here for no reason but that there are some levels of utter, utter crack that require being recorded for posterity.
What?God (5:04:19 PM): Hello. My name is () and I resent neurophysiology.
What?God (5:04:33 PM): I think I’m going to eat. *decisive*
Kate4SFF (5:04:40 PM): *hugs you while you wander off*
Kate4SFF (5:04:51 PM): Neurophysiology loves YOU.
What?god (5:04:58 PM): *hugbacks!* Ta to you, tiny one.
What?god (5:05:19 PM): No, it doesn’t. You always say that, and you’re always WRONG.
Kate4SFF (5:05:37 PM): I am NOT wrong. It is the love that dare not speak its name.
What?god (5:06:23 PM): ……………………………….
What?god (5:06:30 PM): Does that even WORK?
What?god (5:07:02 PM): You just took all the slasher fibers of my soul and perverted them. *sad*
Kate4SFF (5:07:06 PM): BWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA
What?god (5:07:18 PM): Now my soul is made of polyester.
Kate4SFF (5:07:18 PM): The CRACK, the beautiful CRACK!
What?god (5:07:45 PM): DO NOT SLASH ME WITH NEUROPHYSIOLOGY
What?god (5:07:59 PM): ESPECIALLY NOT IN A WAY WHERE NEITHER OF US HAS THE RIGHT ORGANS
What?god (5:08:11 PM): ALTHOUGH OF COURSE IN SOME WAYS NEUROPHYSIOLOGY HAS ALL THE ORGANS
What?god (5:08:18 PM): THE CAPS ARE TOTALLY INTENTIONAL
What?god (5:08:21 PM): I AM GOING TO EAT
Kate4SFF (5:09:57 PM): Late in the night, the door to the empty computer lab creaked open. The lights did not come on, but what the young woman was there for was more satisfying in darkness. She ran her hand sensually over that one spot that would bring her secret lover to life, and sighed as the light of her beloved bathed her face. To her eyes it came, rising before her, dark and complicated in the simple light, with patterns she longed to understand. In the lines of its being she could find the answers to all quesitons. She sighed, moved, as always, and let her fingers dance over all the little spots that communicated such meaning in their touch.
What?god (5:10:24 PM): YOU ARE WRONG IN THE HEAD.
Kate4SFF (5:10:36 PM): The click of keys and the sigh of breath was the only sound in the computer lab for a very long time, before a low, satisfied chiming from the computer speakers signaled her lover, too, was complete.
Kate4SFF (5:11:09 PM): I just cracekd myself up so hard I can’t breathe, so this is probably atrue fact. Bwahahaha
What?god (5:12:06 PM): YOU ARE THE DEFINITION OF ALL THAT IS WRONG IN THE HEAD
(AIM bounceage)
What?god (5:13:05 PM): Whoops. Where was I? Oh yeah, SO WRONG.
Kate4SFF (5:13:25 PM): *snicker*
What?god (5:13:36 PM): My frieeeeeeeeeeenhd, she is insaaaaaaaaaane.
Kate4SFF (5:13:46 PM): You started it with the twelve-steppage.
What?god (5:13:58 PM): Yes, you will snicker right until I write you a Jack/carebears epic.
What?god (5:14:07 PM): Okay, that was a lie.
Kate4SFF (5:14:13 PM): *ded now*
What?god (5:14:17 PM): Where was there twelve-steppage? o.O
Kate4SFF (5:14:42 PM): “My name is X and I Y” is the twelve-steppage. twelve-step program?
What?god (5:14:58 PM): Funny, funny child!
What?god (5:15:14 PM): It’s not just 12 steps, it’s Jerry Springer too…
What?god (5:15:19 PM): Well, thereabouts.
Kate4SFF (5:15:28 PM): Actually, the idea of Jack among the carebears is now a fever-dream I want to give someone who is not Zach, because it would kill him.
What?god (5:15:45 PM): It would kill ANYONE.
What?god (5:16:12 PM): Give it to Tai. Tai has committed many sins, she deserves it.
Kate4SFF (5:16:09 PM): No, no! Catch him at the right age in the right mood, and Jack among the carebears is ADORABLE.
What?god (5:16:41 PM): Yes, but I just said that with a / thrown in and that’s not a concept easily shaken off.
What?god (5:17:00 PM): So. Now you are traumatizing me with the fruits of my own brain. Way to go.
Kate4SFF (5:17:08 PM): *bows*
Kate4SFF (5:17:12 PM): Serves you right!
What?god (5:17:24 PM): Pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt
Kate4SFF (5:17:40 PM): Seriously, my lifelong virgin-except-for-his-marriage is not going anywhere near your /, with or without carebears.
What?god (5:18:07 PM): Yes, that is clearly the only logical objection…
What?god (5:18:28 PM): He is not slutty enough to sleep with care bears. Exactly.
Kate4SFF (5:18:50 PM): Not about the slutty!
Kate4SFF (5:19:23 PM): About the wrapping the mind around it. So there!
What?god (5:20:03 PM): …..In which case, again, clearly the stumbling stone would be the not-with-Zach part…
Kate4SFF (5:20:15 PM): Jack cannot even make brain space for your /, because it all ends in his mind with Zach lying on a beach blanket tasting like sea salt and wearing nothing but a tan and a smile.
Kate4SFF (5:20:28 PM): EXACTLY! You DO understand!
What?god (5:20:31 PM): Why am I attempting to reason with someone who just wrote a human/neurophysiology drabble?
What?god (5:20:42 PM): Awwwwwww!
What?god (5:20:43 PM): HEEEEEEEE.
Kate4SFF (5:20:46 PM): Because you think I’m cute?
What?god (5:20:56 PM): Have I, in fact, mentioned wrong in the head?
Kate4SFF (5:21:00 PM): You have. *solemn*
…
~~ There is nothing whatsoever, in fact, about this picture that doesn’t deeply disturb me. O.o ~~
( Okay, so I was looking through some old chat logs for something completely not-this. I have no IDEA what she was reading at the time that prompted this random, completely contextless outburst. :D )
what?god (06:00:34): Oh, dear god. Zach would be a terrifying anger-management course.
Kate4SFF(06:00:50): HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
what?god (06:03:20) : You get them Pavlov’d so that every time they start getting angry they end up with a stoned smile and a vague compulsion to vote for gay rights.
Kate4SFF(06:03:32): YES!
Kate4SFF (06:03:37): *loves you SOOOOOO*
Kate4SFF (06:03:44): She gets my character, mommy!
.
what?god(4:19:35 PM): Are people threatening to kill you for leaving Zach where he’s been when you stopped?
what?god(4:20:58 PM): If this scene’s this hard to polish, I mean, maybe you should jump ahead to collar dragging?
Kate4SFF (4:25:20 PM): Nah, this is working well, weaving things together very solidly. Can’t do that if I jump scenes. Also? Funny kid.
what?god(4:25:46 PM): Yes, jumping is bad. *hides kidverse*
Kate4SFF (4:26:09 PM): And I left Zach – being utterly cute, if sick (and drunk,) coming to check on Jack, and Jack bundling him off to bed, and there being snugglage and angsty thoughts and rest.
Kate4SFF (4:26:21 PM): *laugh* Jumping is not bad for world building. It is bad for a story.This I have discovered about myself.
what?god(4:26:56 PM): Awww! Okay, I thought he was still much more miserably sick.
Kate4SFF (4:27:14 PM): He was DRUNK. This trumps all things.
what?god (4:27:26 PM): Hee!
Kate4SFF (4:30:23 PM): (Removed quote from MBtM I- V, description of Zach in the doorway at the end, sick but looking less pained.)
Kate4SFF (4:30:31 PM): Nyahnyah you provoked spam.
what?god (4:31:02 PM): hee! Drunk!Zach.*backreads*
what?god (4:31:58 PM): ZACH GO TO BED YOU FOOL.
Kate4SFF (4:32:13 PM): What I spammed you was the last look at Zach they got, before cuddles ensued. Which, this is kind of a Yay! Alcoholic sleep makes it better, yay! thing that is probably a Bad Public Service Message, but whatever.
what?god(4:32:17 PM): *PUTS A MILLION BLANKETS ON ZACH AND HUGS HIM (NYAH NYAH YOU’RE TOO SICK TO KILL ME)*
Kate4SFF (4:32:24 PM): HEEEE!
what?god(4:33:14 PM): Funny kid! ‘getting your badly sick SO who’s running ragged trying to save the world because he CAN drunk: awesome idea!’
what?god(4:33:17 PM): that PSA?
Kate4SFF (4:33:19 PM): You so cute! I was thinking more “Seriously spiked hot toddies: cure for what ails you!” but I like yours better. Zach goes from there and leans on Jack, gets cuddles, and then Jack bundles him off to bed. *pets him*
what?god (4:33:32 PM): Awwwwww
Kate4SFF (4:33:40 PM): So, see, he was left well-cuddled in bed. So no one has yet called for my blood.
what?god (4:33:52 PM): Tick-tock
HAHAHA! Tooo gooood. Jack looks a bit confused. But not really as confused as he should look. :)
Comment by Shane — September 4, 2009 @ 15:55 |
Can’t you just see his little “Well, I never quite know what counts as normal, but I’m pretty sure this is off the charts…” circuits whirring away? *dies*
I swear, this was so funny at the time it was almost fatal. :p
Comment by katedidwhat — September 4, 2009 @ 15:57 |
That picture is SO GREAT! Can she manip Jack into a magnolia tree next? And you guys are really funny. Crimes and misdemeaners, really?
Comment by blackcatwow — October 11, 2009 @ 17:01 |
I like the way you think! *g* Poor Jack, and they’re such fun trees to climb until they start to bloom. :p
In our younger days we Saved the World from church signs insulting gay people. It was A Thing. :p Technically, that’s crimes and misdemeanors. (Do you know if you steal the plastic letters OMOSXULIY from a sign saying “HOMOSEXUALITY IS A SIN, PUT IT FROM YOU” you’re left with a sign saying “HATE IS A SIN, PUT IT FROM YOU” *g*? And, after a while, an extensive collection of plastic letters.)
Comment by Kate Did What? — October 26, 2009 @ 02:15 |